Shit Therapy Fans Say
I apologize for the random audio cut-out on “He’s too upside-down for her!”
But that’s what I said.
- His tone is gentle, riddled with underlying requests. Look at me, blink, remember to breathe. Assure me that I’m not hurting you.
- In the farthest, quietest recess of my mind, I wait for Darius to say something and distract me, but the foremost part of my mind is too preoccupied crying to notice when he doesn’t. He simply sits there on his couch, probably with elbows propped on his knees, and listens to me cry. Written in those sobs are all the feelings I can’t express with words, because there are none. Darius knows that, so he sits, he waits, and he listens.
- He’s watching me warily, from the corners of his eyes. Don’t go there, he says. Don’t go to the dark place where proportions are skewed and hopelessness reigns. We’re going to get through this. You and me, together.
- Comfortable silence falls over Office 215. In that silence, Darius reassures me that I’ll be okay, no matter what the world throws at me after today, and I agree with him.
- “Were you a girl in high school, or something?” … “Close – I was one of those artsy dudes who wore eyeliner and skinny jeans, before they were cool.” I cannot bite back the bark of laughter rising in my throat. “You were a hipster?”
- Every time he does, there’s a visible flash of today’s soft red sweater. Red.
- “It’s only the best color ever,” chimes the Asher in my head. “Nice and sexual.”
COLOR MEME —> Darius in sage green
The second I met Darius Hart, the rest of the world paled in comparison.
- “The first step to overcoming a problem is admitting you have one.”
- “Very few people are strong enough to face their demons alone… We all need support systems.”
- “…the point of life is to take responsibility your mistakes and work past them, not shut down and refuse to move forward.”
- “Strength isn’t sequestering yourself behind walls and sporting a brave mask while you’re imploding… True strength is swallowing your pride and admitting you can’t face everything alone.”
- “Time doesn’t heal all wounds – closure does.”
- “… It’ll most likely take time, but everything worth working toward does.”
- “Your best traits,” he says gently, “are the ones you hide.”
- “… what power does a queen hold without that of her subjects?”
- “Those we aspire to emulate are no more than ordinary human beings.”
- “…even when surrounded by mindless sheep, who so easily bend to fit the mold of society, it is possible to stay real.”
- “Don’t give up on him just because he’s a sleaze… It’s an unfortunate symptom of young adulthood.”
- “Will you tell me what the point is?” “The same piece of lettuce has been stuck between your teeth since the beginning of the sessions and it’s really starting to bug me.”
- “I thought you therapists were more concerned with internal beauty.” “That’s a lie we tell to make the ugly ducklings feel better.”
- “I’ve been nominated for prom queen.” “Oh.” Darius blinks, taken aback. “The horror.”
- “I thought you went to great lengths to not conceal your hatred of the student body.”
- “Yeah, she definitely has it in for you,” Darius interrupts, shocking me back to the present. “You should seriously consider changing your name and transferring schools.”
- “How’d you know it was me?” “This spiffy new invention called caller ID.”
- “I wanted to give you a chance to say it yourself, but if you won’t, it’s boy trouble.” He regards me from the corners of his eyes. “Am I right or am I right?”
- I like this terminology. “Visions,” like I’m some sort of psychic. Not “hallucinations,” like I’m some sort of psychopath.
- That’s when it sinks in. Everything that happened with Katie has literally driven me insane. I’ve officially crossed the breach between average depressed teenager and average psyche ward incumbent.
- Darius, who has done nothing but lean quietly against a window while I argue with a hallucination. Clearly, my insanity doesn’t bother him.
- Just to clue you in on how backwards this is, the awkward part isn’t discussing the bounds of my insanity with a complete stranger.
- “You’re going to have a chat with Katie.” He leaps from the couch like a spring-loaded jack rabbit and sprints to the left end, where he can lean comfortably against the window sill. And I’m crazy one.
- I sneak a sideways glance at Darius for some reassurance. Then I realize he’s encouraging me to converse with a figment of my imagination and temporarily lose faith in his opinion.