• If life had a face, I would punch it.
• “Tacos sound good.” 

• “Come on, Andy,” Tabby interrupts my mulling by yanking my wrist. “Systems are go in, like, two minutes.” We take our seats. Separated from her by the alphabet, I settle in with a crowd of unfamiliar As and Bs and fall to inspecting my nails.
• The faculty speeches pass by without a spike in entertainment levels, though I do derive some enjoyment from glowering at Winsor throughout the duration of hers. Donny Osmond’s speech provides more excitement, but I cannot decide whether his jokes are actually funny, or just sound like they should be, because his voice inflection rises above par.
• My name is among the first called. I succumb to a brief attack of stage fright at the foot of the stairs and trip over my robe, but I recover quickly. Accepting my diploma, I flash a huge smile to the audience, and join in the laughter my classmates share at my expense.
• Only two students stand out amongst the trail taking to the stage. Tabby stands out with her electrifying smile, along with the goofy thumbs-up she flashes me. Leo stands out because of the tattoo on the inside of his wrist. It peeks out from underneath his violet sleeve when he reaches for his diploma. In spite of the horrendous excuse for a graduation gown, he retains a piece of himself. I catch myself smiling when he turns to the crowd, presses his hands together, and bows in Japanese fashion.
• Then all the seniors rush the stage. As one mass of writhing bodies, we fling our caps into the air.

• “Asking you to a dance, involving flowers and fancy attire and limousines, implied romantic intentions on my part.” His response comes without a second’s hesitation. “And, considering you were blissfully unaware of my existence until that day, romantic intentions were jumping the gun.”
• “So I figured I’d invite you to get some tacos – the most casual, least romantic of all foods.”
• “Least romantic?” I echo.
• “There’s nothing romantic in watching a lady dribble ground beef down her chin.”

• That’s the “crown” they awarded her at the Prom I failed to attend. Her victory was one vote shy of unanimous.
• “Hey Andy,” Leo greets. … He waves a hand to indicate the tiara still worked into my curls. “Finally got the crown, I see. Good to know my vote wasn’t cast in vain.”
• “You were the one who kept Tabby from a unanimous vote?”
• He regards me solemnly. “I did it for Betty.”

• “Way back when, I was dating Gabby because she was the girl to date – not because I liked her. The whole time we were together, I developed a crush on Rochelle. I was in denial about it, though. I kept telling myself that we were just best friends, and that she felt too much like a sister to date.”
•  “But then, Gabby found out her parents were going out of town. She planned made plans for me to stay over. It took the prospect of sleeping with her to make me realize how much I didn’t want to, and how much I’d rather it be with… someone else.”
• “Anyway, I went to Rochelle and told her that it was her I loved, not Gabby. Shell, she… she shot me down. She laughed at me and told me straight to my face that she didn’t feel the same way.”
• “I was hurt and angry, and I ended up sleeping with Gabby as retaliation. I hated myself so much afterward that I broke things off with her. I refused to speak to Shell, even though she was graduating that year, and befriended Josh instead. That’s what sent me on my downward spiral.”
• “Rochelle and I started talking again when I reached my senior year, but by then, I was far beyond saving. I hardened myself so much that reconnecting with her didn’t do me good, but it didn’t do me any bad, either. I just kept the going the way I was.”

• “Wait a sec. I want to give you something.” Reaching under the cotton tent that constitutes her gown, she produces a plastic silver tiara encrusted with more silver, in the form of rhinestones. Gripping it with both hands, she thrusts it toward me. …That’s the “crown” they awarded her at the Prom I failed to attend.
• “You won that fair and square. I can’t take it.” “You can, and you will,” she insists, pushing back. …“You’re moving all the way to California, Andy. I know we have phones and internet and all that, but I want you to have something physical to remember me by.”
• Then, with a nonchalant flick of her wrists, she adds, “Besides, you deserve it way more than I do.”

• I’m not sure what consumes me in this moment. Whether it’s fury, passion, or divine providence, the answer arrives in one piece, with all the right phrasing and none of my previous hesitation. No more searching for words that won’t come. They’re all here.
• “What I deserve,” I say, “is someone who refuses to settle for what I am now, who challenges me to strive for what I can become. I deserve someone who will always tell me the truth, regardless of how much it might hurt me. I deserve someone who understands me in silence as easily as conversation, someone who won’t ever intentionally hurt me, and someone who’s brave enough to let me cry.”
• “I fight so much every day. I fight to hide the truth from my parents, because I’m afraid they won’t understand. I fight to hide my emotions from my friends, because I’m afraid they’ll hate me for them. I fight to hide myself from everyone, because I don’t want their pity, and I fight myself, because I don’t want to admit that I’m losing.”
• “After all the battles I wage, what I deserve most of all is someone who will fight for me.”

• “If you knew I didn’t like you, why did you try anything in the first place?”
• He shrugs. “Because I thought if you didn’t feel anything for me, it wouldn’t matter if we-”
• Then he cuts himself off, catching his mistake the second it’s made.

• Asher leans against the counter and watches me with a bemused grin plastered to his face. I halt in my laps to raise an innocent eyebrow at him. “What?” “Nothing,” he says. “Just admiring your form.”
• “I didn’t realizing swimming was a requirement.” … “I’ll have to come out some time and teach you.”
• “What, am I offending you or something? … Cause I can go put a shirt on if it bothers you that much.” “I didn’t say it bothered me.”
• “And what about the educated observers?” He reaches out to twirl one of my wet curls around his finger. “How do I appear to them?” “You’re not that bad.” “Gee, thanks,” he laughs. I become suddenly aware of the fact that his hip is pressed against the edge of my stool, and that he’s leaning forward to talk to me. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

• Irritation grinds through Tabby’s words, bringing to my attention the tears pooling in my eyes. “I didn’t know, Andy. I swear.” Blinking the tears away, I meet her gaze. For the briefest of seconds, her face changes, and I see Katie.
• This time, she’s isn’t smirking, isn’t smiling, and isn’t teasing. Just watching, with the calculating blue eyes wanting so desperately to be loved, but not trusting anyone to do so.
• Shaking free of Asher, I close the gap between me and Tabby in a matter of strides. Then I embrace her.
• I forgive you, I say in my head. But not to her.